1. You act like a high-maintenance diva.

If you refer to yourself as a diva or a princess, remove those words from your vocabulary immediately. Feeling entitled, acting spoiled, and being impossible to please are not traits of a grown woman, they are signs of immaturity of a young girl. Act with grace, manners, and hold yourself on your own. A man’s job in a romantic dynamic is not to be your butler, bank account or your father.

2. You bring up the “What are we?” talk two weeks in.

Women like safety, control and knowing where they stand. Totally understandable. The problem is, while it may feel innate to secure a commitment the minute you have feelings for someone, having a contrived talk to determine the status of a budding romance just weeks in, is too much, too fast.

Avoid the tendency of trying to label things right away, and let things flow organically.

3. You don’t have your own life going on = needy.

We’ve all done this before. We like a guy and suddenly our world revolves around him. Even if we play games of acting hard to get, putting a man as the center of your universe emits an energy of neediness and desperation- one that cannot be hidden, regardless of how long it takes for you to text back.

The most attractive thing about a woman is when they have their own full life – a career, friends, hobbies, community… If a man fits into that life and complements it, great. But the man cannot ever be the center of your happiness, entertainment and community.

4. You put more energy into being pretty than being interesting.

While being pretty can surely get attention, unless you want a guy who just wants a trophy girlfriend, being pretty is not enough. Many women focus on the packaging and not the content. Pretty fades. Real, authentic beauty radiates from the inside – it’s a mixture of confidence, self-respect, values, intelligence, heart and spirit.

5. You cannot carry a quality conversation.

You cannot build rapport by having a one-sided monologue or talking about clothes and gossip. Ask questions, and really listen to the answers. Connection requires lowering your defenses and showing vulnerability – it requires sharing. So give a little, and ask a lot. Try to take the conversation beyond the superficial small talk.